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Greg Gutfeld: Mayorkas is a border czar that only a cartel could love

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So, America’s least popular reality show is still very popular. Yes, I’m talking about Bachelor South of the Border. Millions of illegal immigrants, most of whom appear to be healthy young men, are heading into the light, away from all the other girls in the world. Courting the world’s most eligible bachelorette. That sexy lady in the flowing robe. Yes, the Statue of Liberty. Or as I like to call her, Number Six. I mean, come on, we can do better. So many of the more popular immigrants. Departing from Venezuela It actually passes through six other countries before reaching the Texas border. How did they do that? I walked five blocks and I was exhausted. So does my driver. Now, if you are so desperate that you have to flee your country without a visa or even a passport, aren’t you desperate enough not to be picky? Aren’t you content with the first reasonable option? Not everyone can marry the prom queen. I mean, I got dumped by mine. Because she is so passionate about cheerleading practice and getting good grades. I was 48 years old at that time.

Video shows dozens of immigrants being sent to border before entering U.S. illegally

But why come here when there are so many places in front of us that speak the language and eat better? Well, it’s simple.About six seconds after his sagging, sunken butt hit the Oval Office chair, Joe Throw out the welcome mat It stretches from Washington to Tierra del Fuego. He might as well put up signs in Mexico saying, “Don’t stop! Within a few miles, if you murder someone, you’ll get a free meal and a sex change.” I know. On top of that, the United Nations has just proposed a plan to provide $1.6 billion to 17 Latin American countries, in part in the form of prepaid debit cards for immigrants. Now, the United Nations gets 20 percent of its budget from us, so we’re actually paying for immigrants to come here. what do you know? All of a sudden, there were like 10 million new contestants in America, and they decided we were the one. That’s why it’s time to replace the Statue of Liberty’s torch with a can of pepper spray.

December 18, 2023: Migrants flow into Eagle Pass, Texas, awaiting processing. (Fox News)

Let’s use an analogy! This is an analogy. Not literally. I don’t think they make them that big. Because the White House has turned the Statue of Liberty into a $10 beachfront whore. Not surprisingly, it brought progressivism to its inevitable end. You don’t get to heaven. You will get confusion. No one is illegal. Everyone is welcome. This sounded great in my hot tub until the whole country of Bolivia showed up and then it sounded great. So what is the damage? Well, we had a tug-of-war over razor wire, and it was something that was on the verge of a constitutional crisis.And the well-deserved impeachment hearings Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Mayorkas, He looks like a cross between James Cavill and Caesar Roll. Mayorkas is a border czar that only a cartel could love. So go ahead, impeach. But let’s not get distracted. The government has painted itself into a corner, which is why they are changing the rules now. All of a sudden, we’re told we have to negotiate and we’re on the verge of bipartisan legislation. Both parties. Makes you wonder who they want to buy. After all, why do we have to negotiate borders like this? Wasn’t that part of the original agreement?

The truth is, we don’t need legislation. It’s not difficult. See, when the great orange wall known as Trump came into office, he instituted a policy called “Remain in Mexico.” By the way, that’s exactly the same thing I told Menudo. They did it. But this is just an executive order, a policy issued by the president. All you need is a pen and a phone. Biden keeps confusing two things, which is why he has ink all over his face. So, like most great ideas, stay in mexico, very simple, and very effective. That means migrants who travel across Mexico to claim asylum must wait in Mexico for their cases to be heard in U.S. courts. Now, with progressives erecting every obstacle to deportation they can think of, it could take three years. So, three years of waiting, but now it’s on the Mexican side of the border. False asylum claims will plummet when they get six-star motels instead of luxury hotels. You can no longer dream of trimming Nancy Pelosi’s hedges or taking on Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Biden administration officially ends Trump’s “Remain in Mexico” immigration policy

So, as expected, tent cities started popping up there. Mexico is starting to look as bad as downtown Seattle.Soon, Mexico began enforcing its own rules southern border Keep immigrants out. Imagine that? Staying in Mexico is a good idea, it creates two different southern borders. But since the idea was Trump’s, it had to be withdrawn. It’s like refusing to cash a winning lottery ticket because you don’t like the cashier’s tie. The left hates Trump so much they came out against the beating of a supermodel. Thanks. I think this deserves applause. So it’s not hard to understand why Republicans think this so-called bipartisan border bill will kill Joe himself upon arrival. It should never have been alive in the first place. To the media’s horror, Republicans weren’t fooled. That’s why lunatics like Morning Joe are now accusing Republicans and Trump of murder.

MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough: As Mitt Romney said, people are suffering right now. Fentanyl is rampant at the border, illegal immigrants are flooding the border, and Senate Democrats and Republicans know how to stop it. And House Republicans and Donald Trump won’t do that. is unethical.

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What’s unethical, you assholes, is that after three years of this crap, you’re now pretending to be angry. These two are either stupid or just plain stupid. But they are not smart enough to act so stupid. This is deep. Thankfully, unlike those fools, we didn’t fall for it. The point is, Remain in Mexico still works, and just as easily as Trump did it and Biden canceled it, Biden can redo it. I mean, it’s not like we’re asking him to tie his shoes or recognize his grandson. There’s no negotiation, there’s no legislation. We don’t need to spend millions more on the border. That’s too bad. Hell, If you need money, take what you want and sell the border wall and buy yourself a nice new pen. Then practice signing your name (if you can remember it).

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